Thoughts on Fringe Season 3 Finale The Day We Died

by Amy Yen

What…just happened?

Fringe is a remarkable show in that it asks its cast to play multiple versions of themselves, and not just wearing wigs to varying degrees of success, but as fully fleshed-out characters. By the time we reached the end of season 3, I felt like I knew Fauxlivia & Walternate, & Alt-Charlie & Lincoln Lee, their motivations, their passions, their relationships with each other, just as well as I knew our Olivia, Walter & Peter. What’s more, I liked watching them just as much.

So as much as I enjoyed getting a little glimpse at yet another set of characters, the black-verse, otherwise known as blue-verse circa 15 years in the future, what was ultimately a little disappointing about “The Day We Died,” the Fringe season 3 finale, was that we spent so little time with the two sets of characters we actually already cared about.

It’s not to say that if we spent a season in the future, I wouldn’t care about those characters just as much, but I didn’t have time to. That’s why, besides the brutal way it happened, the death of Future-Olivia failed to either move me, or surprise me, considering we knew the death of a major character was happening this episode. It’s why, besides the lovely moment in the lab with Walter, reminiscing about Gene the cow, Future-Fringe Agent Ella Dunham failed to make an impression. It’s why Peter & Olivia being married didn’t mean nearly what it should have to me.

In a way, the future-verse was a little bit of a love song to the show we do love. Suddenly, we’re back in the pilot & Peter’s getting a bearded Walter from incarceration. They’re going back to the Harvard lab (“So much has happened here. So much is about to”). Peter gets Walter Twizzlers & calls him ‘dad.’

All of those moments are lovely, but they are still rendered pretty much meaningless unless we go back & spend more time in that world. Otherwise, the only thing that matters is Walter’s revelations about the wormholes in time & them being the “First People” who send the doomsday machine back to ancient times to be buried. All that really matters is the part of the episode I liked the least, because I don’t understand it.

Peter served his purpose. He never existed.

What? I can’t even count the ways that doesn’t make sense. If he never existed, Walter never would have gone ‘over there’ to save another him, therefore none of this would have ever happened. If he never existed, the two Walters, the two Olivias never would be where they are, or else they’d be there because of a completely different set of events. And how about like, if Peter never existed, then Fauxlivia never would have had her baby? What about that? And also, do the Observers mean he’s erased his existence with his actions? Or, do they mean he literally never existed, as in they fabricated him to move things to where they are now?

This is why the more I think about it, the more convinced I am that “The Last Sam Weiss” should have been the season finale. That episode ended on a huge twist, but not one that completely leaves the reality of everything that’s happened so far in jeopardy. Could they really be pulling a Lost season 5? Exploding a hydrogen bomb to make it so the plane never crashed?

In Pinker & Wyman we trust, right? Right?

More random thoughts on “The Day We Died”:

• Black credits! Among the items listed: Thought extraction. Brain porting. Chaos structure. Wow, we’re intense in the future.
• FutureAstrid’s hair is B-A. FuturePeter’s hair is a tragedy.
• I would love to get the story behind “what happened in Detroit” & Senator Broyles’ eye…
• In this world, everybody knows Walter Bishop’s name. It’s an interesting idea, people demanding someone to blame for the end of the world.
• “Will Astrid be there?” Aw. Really wished we could have seen those two together, although it’s cool to see Fringe Agent Astrid in the field.
• Bummed we didn’t see the alt-Fringe team at all this episode. I suppose the bit at the end of “Bloodline” with Lincoln & Charlie realizing the Secretary is hiding things from them is just set up for season 4, but it’s disappointing there wasn’t time to build that out this season. The red-verse better not get destroyed before we get some resolution on our alt-Fringe friends.
• Also bummed we didn’t see Sam Weiss again. Hopefully he shows back up next year because otherwise, I feel like he was definitely hyped more than he paid off.
• The light bombs set off by the End of Days group go red, red, red, green, opposite of those other lights we’ve seen before.
• So, Pinkner & Wyman say that Josh Jackson is still under contract for season 4 & I doubt they’d write out one of our main three leads for long. I guess this is why I’m not sold on this twist…I just have no idea whatsoever where they’re going to go from here. Like, I can’t even guess.
• “It can’t be worse than this.” Why did you say that? Of course it can be worse than that!

Thoughts on Doctor Who Series 6 Episode 2 Day of the Moon

by Amy Yen

The second part of the Doctor Who series 6 premiere, “Day of the Moon,” was simultaneously incredibly fun to watch & unbelievably unsatisfying. This is because, even though since new Who began, they’ve always introduced series-long story arcs, they’ve never been quite this open-ended. “Day of the Moon” completely failed in any way to answer all the questions presented in “The Impossible Astronaut.” That wouldn’t really be a problem if one didn’t also get the impression that they’re not going to address any of those questions until, say, the mid-series finale.

Unfortunately, the end of the episode & the preview for episode 3 definitely suggest that Doctor Who will go on their usual path of adventures-of-the-week with only tiny steps forward in the overall arc until the last couple of episodes. That’s not such a big deal when the overall arc is something as innocuous as “Bad Wolf” or Torchwood, but it is when the arc is Amy being possibly or possibly not pregnant, the little girl in the spacesuit possibly or possibly not being a time lord and, you know, the death of the Doctor. If they seriously don’t address any of this for like three or four more episodes, it’s going to be a very frustrating season.

This is again not to say “Day of the Moon” was a bad episode, because it wasn’t, although it was a little scattered for a Moffat episode. There were a lot of bits where I didn’t understand at all why people were doing what they were doing. Like, besides setting up for a really fun pay-off, why was it necessary to have the whole thing at the beginning of the episode with Canton pretending to lock the Doctor up & hunt down the TARDIS crew? Why were they split up & where they were (& in River’s case, wearing what they were wearing) to begin with? Also, how the hell did Canton & the Area 51 team get zero-balance dwarf star alloy?

That being said, the entire idea of the Silence’s invasion, that they’d been planting ideas & controlling the actions of the human race for thousands of years, is as terrifying as the Doctor’s solution, using their own post-hypnotic suggestion against them, is brilliant. “How fast can you run,” indeed.

More thoughts on “Day of the Moon”:

• “Welcome to America.” Again, much love for Canton. Shades of Will Smith in Independence Day in that scene. Mark Sheppard also makes a great villian, even when he’s just pretending to be one.
• Loved the recording device hand implants, especially the Doctor’s demonstration of how it works to Canton on the TARDIS & Amy’s completely terrifying (how many times have I used that word describing the Silence? well, they are) scene at the orphanage with the sleeping Silences on the ceiling.
• Another awesome River escape scene, although it’s very similar to her scene from “Time of Angels,” if less clever (one assumes she would have left a message with her coordinates for the Doctor somewhere in time & space if she had needed to) but more funny (another reference to the TARDIS swimming pool!).
• “Tricky Dickie. They’re never going to forget you.” A lot of random & gratuitous use of Nixon in this episode, although I enjoyed how he always just immediately started giving whoever it was he was presented to pep talks on patriotism. I also liked that the Doctor tells him he has to always tape what’s going on in the Oval Office & then tells him to say hi to David Frost.
• River Song & The Doctor share their first (hilariously awkward) kiss after yet another outrageous display of flirting in the final showdown scene with the Silence (“Stop it.” “Make me.” “Yeah, well, maybe I will.”). He certainly isn’t acting like he doesn’t trust her now. He even gives her a formal invitation to come with them. I can’t wait to find out who she is already.
• I like Rory. I just don’t like that they’re still going there with the Amy & the Doctor ridiculousness. We’re past that point, aren’t we? I did like their make-up at the end. “It’s a figure of speech, moron.”
• “Rome fell.” “I know, I was there.” “So was I.” Is it significant that Rory sometimes can’t remember his 2,000 years as an Auton?
• “Incredibly strong & running away. I like her.” Yes, but who is she? Who is that little girl & OMG, is she regenerating?! WHAT?!
• “This is my friend, River. Nice hair, clever, has her own gun. And unlike me, she really doesn’t mind shooting people. I shouldn’t like that. Kind of do, a bit.” Yes, let’s talk about that. Here’s the Doctor, who abhors violence, who would yell at Jack for drawing his gun. Now he doesn’t bat an eyelash at River Song killing eight Silences (or at Canton wounding one, or for that matter, at the entire human race killing the Silence on sight). It really is a whole new Doctor.

Thoughts on Fringe Season 3 Episode 21 The Last Sam Weiss

by Amy Yen

WHAT?! But how can…wait, does this mean…WHAT?! OMG I CAN’T EVEN!!

And to think that about halfway through this episode, I was thinking it was getting too ridiculous to buy into, even for Fringe. Turns out I am a fool. Obviously I should just put my complete & utter faith in Pinkner & Wyman, sit back & shut up, because the end of “The Last Sam Weiss” was amazing. In retrospect, all of “The Last Sam Weiss” was amazing.

Obviously, the part I was having trouble with was the drawing of Olivia, which, besides triggering all sorts of Alias flashbacks, seems just kind of way too coincidental. Besides the ‘fate’ explanation, how in the world does all of this happen to come down to our heroes, Peter & Olivia? But once they got to the scene at Liberty Island, with the two of them holding hands with total belief in each other, I had a really hard time remembering just what was so wrong with the ‘fate’ explanation to begin with.

Plus, the whole situation ended up being yet another completely unexpected & wonderful callback to a seemingly forgotten first season episode, this time David Robert Jones’ light-box test from “Ability.” The fact that this keeps happening (from the amber in the bus from “The Ghost Network” to the accelerated pregnancy from “The Same Old Story“) proves the writers clearly know what they’re doing & I should just stop doubting & enjoy the ride.

More random thoughts on “The Last Sam Weiss”:

• In fact, the whole episode had a ton of awesome callbacks, the two best being “I am going home,” what Peter leaves on the hospital bed reflecting the note his younger self wrote his mother in “Subject 13” before almost drowning in the lake trying to go back to the other universe &, of course, “Be a better man than your father,” the phrase that William Bell has Olivia repeat to Peter upon returning from the other universe the first time.
• The callback to the light-box test is also interesting because it seems to strongly suggest most of us were right: Olivia being able to do these things — to turn off the lights, to type the messages, to turn off the force field on the machine — has to do with both her & Peter being there together, like they were at the light-box. Oh, fate.
• Also nice to see the typewriter again & get a more detailed explanation on how it works. Unbelievably, it makes sense now.
• So, Sam Weiss turned out to be a lot less mysterious & sinister than we all thought. He’s more of an observer (not that kind…or is he?), a keeper of a bunch of information passed down through his family, but he is greatly concerned about the consequences of his interfering with events. But if he really doesn’t know any more than he’s saying, what’s with the “A Demon’s Twist Rusts” (Don’t trust Sam Weiss) business in “Over There, Part 2″?
• “I work in a bowling alley.” Just because he didn’t turn out to be an actual live First Person (as far as we know), doesn’t mean he wasn’t kind of totally awesome in this episode.
• Speaking of interfering with events, is the final twist in the episode, Peter getting transported to the future, what was meant to happen? Also…what universe is he in? That isn’t the red-verse’s Fringe badge.
• Totally random, but anyone notice the hash tag #Fringe in the corner of the screen? Nice.
• OMG this promo!

Thoughts on Doctor Who Series 6 Premiere The Impossible Astronaut

by Amy Yen

I must have really missed Doctor Who. I know because all of the callbacks in “The Impossible Astronaut” — from “Hello sweetie” to “fish fingers and custard” — all elicited the same gleeful reaction from me. And why shouldn’t they? Here’s a show where stetsons are cool.

Part 1 of the series 6 premiere is classic Steven Moffat, packed full of extremely creepy monsters, timey-wimey puzzle pieces & clever, clever lines. And while the spacemen (presumably, although it is never actually said, the Silence from last series) are terrifying (you can’t remember them unless you’re looking right at them) & the Doctor recruiting his past self & his companions to…do what exactly?…is both fun & scary at the same time, the best part of the episode to me was the full fleshed out, completely wonderful relationships between the four leads.

The Doctor & Amy are the same as ever, with a full series of complete trust in each other under their belts. Even as the Doctor flirts outrageously with River, he reminds her that he can never truly trust her (cold, even for him). But he will trust Amy.

“My life in your hands. Amelia Pond.” This is nothing new. His life has been in Amy Pond’s hands before & nothing has changed between them. What is new & surprisingly fun to watch is where Rory fits in to all this. With many complaints that Amy & Rory spent very little of series 5 acting like people about to get married, here, they do. Rory has also clearly grown up quite a bit since the last series…he even catches on quicker than Amy about what has to be done. He & River talk logically, maturely, about the clues in front of them, while Amy is still too devastated to think straight. It’s impressive. He’s impressive. And it’s nice to see him develop as a companion on his own, rather than just as an extension of Amy.

It’s also Rory who gets from River the straight answer about the “far worse day” she’s dreading so much. It’s not just that she & the Doctor keep meeting out of order. It’s that they’re essentially meeting in the opposite order. Which means the day is coming when she will meet a Doctor that has no idea who she is. Of course, we’ve already seen this, their adventure in the Library. But it’s heartbreaking hearing it from her. Because it’s taken a little while to love River Song (her, and not just the idea of her), but as she corrected the Doctor’s movements in the TARDIS (“Just admiring your skills, sweetie”), it is hard not to.

More random notes on “The Impossible Astronaut”:

• I loved Canton Everett Delaware III. I’m a little predisposed to it, having enjoyed genre TV staple Mark Sheppard as Crowley on Supernatural, Romo Lampkin on Battlestar Galactica, Sterling on Leverage, Valda on Warehouse 13 & a million other things, but I was pleasantly surprised to see him so well used here in what is reportedly just a guest role. But Canton is a companion, both officially (he is invited to travel in the TARDIS & even gets Rory’s awkward orientation) & spiritually (he delights, rather than panic, in the face of the impossible). I didn’t think of it until later, but what’s brilliant about him is he is our companion introduction — a plot device that reintroduces the wonders of the TARDIS to the audience (think Ten mouthing along with Martha, “It’s bigger on the inside!” “Is it? I hadn’t noticed!”). Usually this is accomplished when the Doctor invites someone new on board, but since this is the first series since series 2 that does not introduce a new full-time companion, we get Canton as a stand-in.
• “We’re in a box that’s bigger on the inside that travels in time and space.” “Yeah, basically.” “How long has Scotland Yard had this?” HA! I’m really sad Canton is not recurring now. Also, not a bad American accent, Mark Sheppard. It’s kind of funny that he uses his British accent on all his U.S. roles & here, on the quintessential U.K. show, he plays an American.
• So, the Doctor’s “waving” at Rory & Amy through history books was pretty much the most hilarious thing of all time. I mean, the painting, with the cherubs & the trident? SERIOUSLY.
• “What face?” “The ‘he’s hot when he’s clever’ face.” “This is my normal face.” “Yes it is.” So, the Doctor flirts now? This one does, it seems, mostly with River Song (although the line about Jefferson, Adams & Hamilton was pretty funny…wonder which two fancied him?).
• “Human beings. I thought I’d never get done saving you.” Really, so many good lines in this episode.
• Not one, but two “Doctor who?” lines in this episode. Interestingly, neither of them are answered with “Just The Doctor.” Also, Canton gets to say the “bigger on the inside” line. The Doctor wasn’t even paying attention, so it didn’t even make up with Rory not saying it.
• Have I mentioned lately how much I love the Eleventh Doctor’s Theme?
• Nice callback to the Master’s funeral pyre with not being able to leave a time lord’s body up for grabs.
• “A lot more happens in 1969 than anyone remembers.” Right, like Ten & Martha Jones getting stuck for three months while Sally Sparrow fights off the Weeping Angels.
• The spaceman kind of looks like an Ood.
• Utah is gorgeous. Makes me want to go there, which I can say is a new feeling.
• Amy is pregnant. Wait, really?
• So, I’m reading a few reviews that are criticizing the episode for being overly mythology-heavy & inaccessible to the casual viewer. They are not wrong. If you’re watching Doctor Who for the first time, this is probably not the episode to do it. There’s not even a previouslys to catch you up on how the blue box is bigger on the inside, who River Song is, how time can be rewritten, etc. But as a fan of Fringe, the most mythology-immersed show on TV right now, I have to say, accessibility is overrated. The serialization, the mythology, the call-backs, that’s what makes this episode so damn fun. If you want to know what’s going on, go back, start with “Rose,” like I did.
• In memory of Elisabeth Sladen. Goodbye, our Sarah Jane Smith.

PS: So Part 2 of the premiere, Day of the Moon, looks incredible:

Fringe Beats the Friday Night Death Slot!

by Amy Yen

Nicely done, Fringe nation! Our little sci-fi show that could has beaten the Friday Night Death Slot into submission & has been picked for a full 22-episode fourth season.

[Pause for collective exhale. Seriously, thank God.]

To the rest of you — and here, I am aware I am speaking to the majority of the American television viewing public — I just want to re-emphasize that you are missing a great show. I might even call it the best drama on TV right now. It certainly has some of the best acting. Its mythology is as richly developed & possibly better executed than even Lost at its best. And most impressively of all, all the parallel universes & doomsday machine shenanigans is just a very clever disguise for what is actually a very simple, very human story.

I know it’s kind of unrealistic to expect anyone to jump on board now…I imagine it might be slightly confusing to tune in to find two parallel universes about to go to war with one another if you don’t have some backstory. Luckily, now that the fourth season has been secured, you have all summer to catch up. Trust me, you won’t regret it.

Also, all those people who won’t stop saying that Fox doesn’t support genre programming? I think you can let that go now. First Terminator gets a full two seasons, then Dollhouse somehow gets a second year, now Fringe is getting a fourth? It really doesn’t get more supportive.

Anyway, time to start getting psyched for the finale (PS: how amazing are those episode titles??) & thinking about wish lists for season 4 (Prime-verse Lincoln Lee joining the Fringe team, more Astrid & of course, another 80′s flashback episode, so we can see the awesome opening sequence again)…

PS: Community, Parks & Recreation AND Fringe all renewed? That’s three of my four top shows on TV right now (#4 is Justified, which is looking good for renewal on FX also). Hooray for the continuation of quality television!

Ad Post: The Mechanic Movie Poster QR Code

by Amy Yen

The Mechanic Movie Advertising
Agency: CBS Films/Millenium Films/Nu Image Entertainment/GmbH

So I’ve been walking by street advertising for the new Jason Statham movie The Mechanic for a few weeks now & just today noticed the QR code embedded in the guns-in-a-gun image on the signage & posters. While it can’t be that effective since it’s hard to notice unless you’re looking closely, it acts like kind of an Easter egg for those who do. The code, which in it of itself is designed to look like a target, leads to the mobile version of the official movie website, including the trailer & the definition for the term ‘mechanic.’ It’s an interesting & well-done use of the technology, at least for those who see it.

I’m a Social Media Customer Service Brat

by Amy Yen

If I yelled at you unnecessarily or maybe just acted generally hostile last week, I’m sorry. I think it’s safe to tell you now…my cable & internet were out. That’s right, the whole week! I KNOW! Do you see why I was so grumpy now? It’s lucky I didn’t set anything on fire.

Anyway, now that I’m back online, it’s time to make a petty observation. In between waiting on hold with customer service & waiting for the technician to show up three hours late, I obviously spent some time venting on Twitter about my deep, seething hatred for Time Warner Cable. I did it more than once. Don’t think I didn’t notice that nobody from Time Warner bothered to contact me. As much as my brother out east complains about Comcast, I’m pretty certain that if I had done the same thing with them, that wouldn’t have been the case.

So I realized that it’s come to the point where consumers like me will not only not hesitate to blast your brand all over the internet, but will expect you to notice when we do it & find a way to fix it. What can I tell you? I’m a social media customer service brat.

Anyway, that’s all I wanted to point out. If you need me, I’ll be catching up on all the Hulu I missed last week.

Thoughts on Doctor Who – A Christmas Carol

by Amy Yen

By definition, a Christmas special, especially for a family show, is going to be centered on moral lessons & warm, fuzzy feelings about generosity & love & family & good will toward men. Rarely will you even have anything as substantial as Community’s excellent “Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas.”

Steven Moffat’s first Doctor Who Christmas special, “A Christmas Carol,” is no different, although it does manage to get in some of Moffat’s trademark dark themes (daddy issues & domestic abuse abound!) & timey-wimey goodness to boot. Overall, it was a satisfying episode, to tide us hungry Whovians over until series 6 finally rolls around, & the moral cheesiness & fake CGI shark-powered sleigh rides can be forgiven. After all, it’s Christmas.

Other random thoughts on “A Christmas Carol”:

• Although the “big idea” behind the episode, the Doctor’s version of the famous Ghost of Christmas Past, Present & Future tale—the Doctor literally inserting himself into Kazran’s timeline & rewriting his past to change who he is—is quite clever, it does seem slightly irresponsible on the Doctor’s part. It seems the further we get from the RTD era, the less we hear about fixed points in time, not messing too much with things that have already happened, & the more we hear about how time can be rewritten. Of course, there are consequences, both the machine no longer responding to Kazran’s touch & the tragic romance of Kazran & Abigail. I like that the Doctor didn’t try to fix Abigail, realizing that this is how it has to be.
• It happens that I just bought Steven Moffat’s version of Sherlock on DVD for my dad for Christmas. Matt Smith’s monologue, where he explains to Kazran the significance of him not hitting the boy, sounded exactly like one of Sherlock’s explanations when he has to explain the 14 logical steps he’s taken in his head, faster than everyone else in the room can get through one of them, to get to the conclusion he’s just presented.
• “Fish that can swim in fog. I love new planets.” I love that the Doctor can always take the time to smell the roses & revel in the marvelousness of the universe.
• Little Kazran Sardick cries for the dying shark that just tried to eat him. This is how you know Kazran is inherently good. The Doctor doesn’t change him that much. It’s also exactly the kind of thing I think will earn you the Doctor’s undying love.
• Kazran has seemingly known the Doctor his whole life. Just like Amy.
• “Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him, Jeff.” The Doctor really did have some fantastic lines in this episode.
• “Eyes off the skirt.” Heh! PS: Yay for Arthur Darvill making the credit sequence!
• I love that the Doctor is still possibly married to Marilyn Monroe.
• “Like we’re saying, well done, everyone. We’re halfway out of the dark. Back on Earth, we call this Christmas.” Halfway out of the dark… Sometimes I can’t even believe how good Steven Moffat is with words.

And finally, for your viewing pleasure, the series 6 trailer:

Happy Holidays, everyone! (PS: Remember, stetsons are cool.)

Ad Post: FOX – Fringe Moves to the Friday Night Death Slot

by Amy Yen

FOX 1:00 spot
Agency: FOX Marketing & Special Ops

This is a few weeks old, but I really wanted to give FOX some kudos for this clever & rather brave promo they released in response to the outcry over the recently announced move of Fringe to the supposed Friday Night Death Slot (as opposed to where it was before, otherwise known as the most competitive timeslot on TV). The 1:00 spot tongue-in-cheek threatens to “reanimate” Friday nights while actually quoting from the numerous blog and media posts lamenting the demise of the show. While, as a fan, I’ve been in the exact same state of emotion since the announcement—something in between unreasonable anger & self-pitying resignation—& as a pretty close observer of media trends, I cannot buy the idea that FOX can actually attract the teen demographic they are claiming to be going after, as an advertising & marketing junkie, I really admire FOX’s guts in putting out an ad like this.

As for Fringe’s chances of actually reanimating Fridays, I’m actually still clinging to a bit of hope. It’s no secret that the consensus is that this is Fringe’s best season yet creatively & it has a ton of critical support right now. I also think it’s pretty reasonable to think that its audience will follow it to Fridays, considering that, since they abandoned all notions of being a non-myth-arc-based show this year, the only people left watching are the die-hards anyway. As expected, the producers are spinning the move as positively as possible, but I do actually believe them when they say they’re still getting a lot of network support for the show. So, when Kevin Reilly says it’ll be a big win for FOX if Fringe can hang on to its existing (low) ratings on Fridays, I believe him. This is, after all, the man who renewed Dollhouse & gave Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles a full 22-episode second season. I also think that, with Fringe’s pedigree (I do think JJ’s name pulls some weight in this situation, particularly because Abrams’ Alcatraz is among FOX’s fall pilots), the idea that FOX might tell the producers up front that they’ll get a fourth season & it will be the last, for sure, isn’t out of the question.

At the very least, I expect FOX to give the writers enough notice to wrap up the story this year if it comes to that. And that will have to be enough. After all this, the move to the Fridays isn’t the one that upsets me. It’s the one to Thursdays, which I still don’t think should ever have happened. But what’s done is done & we might just have to be happy with three seasons of a great show. Let’s hope it’s four though.

Ad Post: NFL on FOX – It’s Good to Have a Ring

by Amy Yen

NFL on FOX :30 spot
Agency: Fox Sports Marketing

Former Dallas Cowboys quarterback & current NFL on FOX analyst Troy Aikman is a promotion veteran, selling everything from Samsung phones to Acme Bricks, but for all the times I’ve seen him sell stuff, particularly living in Dallas, this is the first time I laughed out loud.

Part of FOX’s series of ads, which also feature Aikman’s broadcast partner Joe Buck, being a good sport about being insulted by Dr. Phil & watching Troy party with Usher & Hugh Laurie, this spot also uses Buck’s exasperation as the punch line (“Can I just get a water? Somewhere?”). Another spot features Buck slumming in line at TSA while Terry Bradshaw, Howie Long & Jimmy Johnson cruise through the special red carpet “Super Bowl Ring Holders” line (with Jimmy almost-but-not-quite getting stopped for carrying a samurai sword…or is that a machete?). Very funny stuff.